tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55231228928092588742023-11-15T05:43:06.944-08:00Listing LOLZ.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.comBlogger38125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-56687569144406097232009-07-27T09:04:00.000-07:002009-07-27T09:06:45.626-07:00Designer Fashion Hanger<i>Calvin Klein Designer Pants/Skirt Fashion Hanger. Excellent condition. Measures 14 1/4" l. I have many more women's accessories available in my ebay store :) </i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/7244_1_thumb200.jpg" img align="center" / ><br /><br /><a href="http://www.bonanzle.com/booths/RummageLady/items/Calvin_Klein_Designer_Pants_Skirt_Fashion_Hanger">$5</a>. Again, the hopeful ":)"<br /><br /><a href="http://bonanzle.com/">Bonanzle</a> is new to me but it looks like it'll be a...a <i>bonanzle</i> of LOLZ.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-35012181619956740262009-07-16T07:36:00.000-07:002009-07-16T07:46:01.182-07:00Nebraskan Entrees<a href="http://www.lps.org/post/detail.cfm?id=391">Entrees</a> as interpreted by the Lincoln, Nebraska public school system. <br /><br />"Chicken Fingers"<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Chicken_Fingers.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"Fiestada"<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/taco_chalupa.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"Chicken Ranch Salad"<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Chicken_Ranch_Salad.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />The salads are probably the worst, teaching as they do that salads are things to be feared and that one's cheap meat and cheese is better deposited on <a href="http://isite.lps.org/mhaun/entree_photos/taco_scoopers.jpg">old tortilla chips</a>.<br /><br />Not pictured here: <a href="http://isite.lps.org/mhaun/entree_photos/Nebraska_Bun.jpg">Nebraska bun</a>. <i>?</i>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-56555256786823120562009-07-16T05:33:00.000-07:002009-07-16T06:15:44.678-07:00"One-piece formal wear"<a href="http://www.usedottawa.com/classified-ad/8463149">"I weared it to X-mas party."</a> The idea of "one-piece formal wear" that was not a gown intrigued. Predictably, it is "Polyester & spandex for elasticity." "Top is attached to pants, a zip on the back, strips, sleevless." And the seller has done some modelling, natch.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW84631492.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW84631491.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Very nice, you say, at least for one-piece poly XL maternity wear. But then comes the WTF punch:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW84631493.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />!!??KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-17276601925814033662009-07-15T09:36:00.000-07:002009-07-16T07:52:13.631-07:00Aprons to make your child cry"Mother Daughter Cafe Apron Set"<br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=11303560">With Kotex applique</a>. <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN25247817.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=11170925">With WTF</a>.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN24816112.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=11171480">Flying turtlebee</a>?<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN24817981.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />I imagine she finds the cling-with-thumb cute, but I find it bizarre to use that here. That thumb-in, clinging-to-Mummy state is a very vulnerable one, and normally a relatively private one. Using it to sell aprons is maybe not the best idea. Time to put the digital camera down and make with the hugs, here.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-72301541563241664362009-07-04T10:12:00.000-07:002009-07-04T10:21:13.004-07:00I am A FREAK<img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/18134308115362856138.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />This neglected child SHOUTED HIS WHOLE AD on <a href="http://www.okcupid.com/profile/FLEDGLINGFREAK/">OkCupid</a>, and is offering an extraordinarily bad deal.<br /><br /><quote>THE WOMAN FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO RECEIVE THIS UNIQUE OPPORTUNITY WILL BE FULLY AWARE THAT THE VALUE OF A QUALITY, FULL BODY SUIT IS $50,000 TO $500,000. IN EXCHANGE FOR ALLOWING ONLY ARTISTS FROM MY SHOP TO WORK ON HER BODY SUIT AND FOR AGREEING TO A LONG TERM ASSOCIATION WITH MY PROJECT IN WHICH SHE WORKS AS A SIDESHOW PERFORMER AND SUPER-MODEL, SHE WILL RECEIVE THE WORK AT A DISCOUNTED RATE AND WILL RECEIVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO EARN THE TATTOOS BY HELPING ME AS MY PART-TIME SALES REPRESENTATIVE (NO MONEY INPUT REQUIRED ON YOUR PART EVER)</quote><br /><br />Tr.: work for me under long-term contract -- unpaid. Among other requirements, this BEAUTY (BY MODELING STANDARDS) must be INTELLIGENT AND INTERESTED IN ALL MY INTERESTS (THESE ARE MY BUSINESS'S INTERESTS AS WELL EG. TATTOOS, SIDESHOWS, PUNK ROCK). Also must like teh cock.<br /><br />I AM EXTREMELY SERIOUS AND HAVE SIGNIFICANT RESOURCES AT MY DISPOSAL. Apply now.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-70881159555719244242009-06-28T10:40:00.000-07:002009-07-04T12:36:00.205-07:00No good, awful, terrible, very bad jeans.<img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/o_A2uNXMf5ndoZRi4.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.ioffer.com/i/Womens-Christian-Dior-Jeans-Dior-501-82276306">Christian Dior</a> jeans. Purportedly. More "designer" chav denim <a href="http://www.diytrade.com/china/4/products/3167720/7_For_All_Mankind_of_Antik_Men_and_Women_Branded_dolce_gabbana_Jeans.html">from China</a>:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/7_For_All_Mankind_of_Antik_Men_and_.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />The jeans the not very popular kid got for Christmas in 1984. Which made everybody feel bad for him, because everybody knew they were on sale for $9.99 at Warren's and only the worst sort of Mom or Dad would try to pass off the on-sale unsalable jeans as a Christmas present. And you looked at them and thought <i>if you took that stupid-ass chain off and stopped tucking in your awful acrylic sweaters you could almost pretend they were just some old gray jeans, but no...you</i> like <i>the chain. Loser.</i><br /><br />But these relatively honest frauds pale in comparison to <a href="http://www.bonanzle.com/users/11639/profile">wayofthelittleflower</a>'s stuff.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/2653_1.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Crystal barbed-wire mom jeans, <br /> <a href="http://www.bonanzle.com/booths/wayofthelittleflower/items/Handpainted_barbwire_Swarovski_Harley_pants_jeans_4">$130</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/5ea7_1.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"Painted fire crystal jeans," <a href="http://www.bonanzle.com/booths/wayofthelittleflower/items/Destroyed_Aeropostale_painted_fire_crystal_jeans_3_4">$150</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/IMG_5526.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"Hollister Emilio Pucci scarf patched Swarovski jeans," <a href="http://www.bonanzle.com/booths/wayofthelittleflower/items/Hollister_Emilio_Pucci_scarf_patched_Swarovski_jeans_2_4">$150</a>. "Custom destroyed in all the right places and patched with a vintage Emilio Pucci silk scarf." The combination of Swarovski plus Pucci plus Hollister = <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/classy.png" img align="center">KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-15557580895142664112009-06-13T05:29:00.000-07:002009-06-13T11:14:15.804-07:00Idiot tax = $5<img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/gview.png" img align="center"><br /><br />From the <a href="http://gtboutique.com/">Giant Tiger</a> flyer.<br /><br />I'm not quite sure what the deal is with this one. Usually these things are sadly transparent -- if it was in a Burberry plaid you could be reasonably confident that its hapless buyer would be a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav">chav</a> seeking a little touch of tough; if it had a Chanel logo, the <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1192166/When-cleaner-wearing-outfit-isnt-time-reach-designer-labels-again.html">class insecurity issues</a>* would be clear. But what message is the Coors Light chair offering, and why is it worth a premium? I'm at a loss.<br /><br /><br /><small><small>* For related LOLZ check out <a href="http://fashionjournalistinthecity.blogspot.com/2008/10/sick-of-fake-bags.html">this</a> grasping <i>People can always tell when you're wearing a fake and it makes you look ignorant!</i> rant.</small></small>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-74614849027052372442009-06-12T06:21:00.000-07:002009-06-12T08:18:48.992-07:00Hard times.<i>I have a box of stuff for use in the kitchen...<br />$15 <br />Pick up only</i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3n53ke3p7ZZZZZZZZZ96184e18eed86911d.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3k93o73p9ZZZZZZZZZ961381101f2907c16.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/for/1200520538.html">Via Craigslist</a>. You know it's going to be bad when the seller couldn't even bother to straighten it up a bit before photographing it. However, pots are useful, and this is not the worst of today's cull.<br /><br /><i>Queen's University Belfast Spiral Notebooks <br />2 available: $10 each or both for $15 <br />Brand new in perfect shape</i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3k93me3p2ZZZZZZZZZ96447bf813d46a511.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/for/1205391005.html">CL</a> again. <i>Quoi?</i> Why on earth would this person even fantasize that somebody might buy a notebook from him, let alone for $10 a go? The same (apparently, given the background) drug addict is also offering <a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/clo/1193535567.html<br />">this</a>:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3n03k43maZZZZZZZZZ95s2d2e9ad534661e.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><i>Shoe bag / toiletry kit <br />From Lufthansa Business Class <br />Toiletry kit includes mask, socks, toothpaste, toothbrush. <br />Comes in a bag that is perfect for shoes. <br />Four available: $5 for one bag, $15 for all four. </i><br /><br />I love his quantity discounts...<br /><br />From <a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/hsh/1209838386.html">Nepean</a> comes<br /><br /><i>MUST SELL! ODDS AND ENDS - $15<br /><br />Moving, Must Get Rid of! Must Pick up by Friday the 12th! <br /><br />- desk lamp <br />- silver ware holder <br />- binder <br />- chocolate molds <br />- cutting board <br />- apple cutter <br />-ice cube tray <br />- 2 shaker tins <br />- freezer mug <br />- door hanger <br />- st. patricks mugs <br />- sturdy milk crate <br />- black metal waste basket <br />- wall filler <br />- crayons <br />- sunglasses <br />- duct tape <br />- belt <br />- bubble straws <br />- playing cards <br />- green and blue plastic bins <br />- origial foam board art </i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3m53p73lfZZZZZZZZZ96766b0c4c4f8c919.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3k73m33ocZZZZZZZZZ967f4f43e30a6e014.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3nd3k23oaZZZZZZZZZ967ab7095639ed110.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Why does she* think she's not going to need duct tape again? Mystifying!<br /><br />There is an important lesson here, which is: whether or not you can eventually sell it on Craigslist is a good way to gauge whether something is a nice object or a useless bit of tat. If it is not something you can use up and, like plastic St Patty's mugs, it is something nobody in their right mind would ever buy off you, it's probably garbage best left in the store. It is not thin plastic bags from shops which are ruining the planet, but the overconsumption of this sort of schlock. That and the overproduction of necessary but shoddy goods -- the first ad is a good argument in favour of buying only the nicest sort of saucepan in lieu of several middling-to-lousy sets throughout your life.<br /><br /><br /><small><small>* I cannot imagine a he having a pastel tablecloth with a wee vase of something on it.</small></small>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-67231775499591326052009-06-09T09:51:00.000-07:002009-06-09T10:44:06.361-07:00$6 t-shirtsW...t...f?<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Origins--T-SHIRT-11297.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://6dollarshirts.com/product.php?productid=11297&cat=0&page=1">$6</a>. Americans are disturbingly rude about their politicians. LOLZ U IS STALIN!!!! All I can think of right now are Sarah Palin heads stuck on nude bodies on teh internets. Really rude.<br /><br />I had to click on this one to find out what the mouth-breathed explanation would be. From the reviews:<br /><br /><i>Only in America would anyone even consider this plausible. Dudes, you have no idea what socialism is. You've been living to the right of every other country on the planet for the past 30 years.</i><br /><br /><i>Great. I'm sure this will sell well in Alabama where half the people have to have shit read to them. WTF? Oh, and for the dumbfucks fearing this so-called 'socialism', how's that good ol' American capitalism treating you? Maybe when you lose your job (like 1 out of 10 of us already have) and have to rely on government programs you'll have another name for it. And when that runs out, you can eat this fucking shirt.</i><br /><br />Summed up:<br /><br /><i>It is a shirt. This is a website that sells shirts.</i><br /><br />Moving along then...<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Poop-It-s-What-s-For-Dinner-T-SHIRT.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://6dollarshirts.com/product.php?productid=11177&cat=0&page=1">$6</a>. At 'Value Village' I often run into shirts for sale that are emblazoned with stuff like <b>ROGER REDDY'S HWY 61 FORD-CHEVY BREAST CANCER FUNDRAISING DAY 2004 -- SNACK BAR STAFF</b>, and I think, "I know it's brand new and only $2, but still, who's going to buy this?" It finally hit me the other day: hipsters with attics. You could sit on that junk for twenty years and sell it for $25 once the date got old enough and the font sufficiently kitschy. (<a href="http://6dollarshirts.com/product.php?productid=11281&cat=0&page=2">They have this idea already</a>, but the shirt is too fake-y.)<br /><br />Anyway. A shirt with <b><large>POOP</large></b> on it is never going to work for anybody but the most useless sort of sub-clinical fetal alcohol syndrome victim. Yuk yuk yuk my shirt says shit. <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Consey-s-Port-O-Lets-T-SHIRT-11151.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Keep-Your-Shitty-Music-To-Yourself-.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Yuk yuk yuk. <br /><br />Then there are ones like these:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/Rats-Off-To-Ya-T-SHIRT-11272.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/I-Want-the-Gold-T-SHIRT-11235.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />which leave me puzzled over whose leg is being pulled...KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-64863653316922415092009-05-30T08:03:00.000-07:002009-05-30T11:58:05.568-07:00Seriously unprofessional cupcakesSeriously unprofessional cupcakes, <a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/bab/1178782851.html">$85</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3k63m23l8ZZZZZZZZZ95j656d7073861714.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><pre>Cupcake Party !!! <br />Let us host your next birthday party! <br />Included in the price are … <br />• 24 display cupcakes on carousel wheel <br />• Handcrafted, plastic apron for each child with logo <br />• 1 decorated, candled cake in shape of cupcake <br />• 12 plain cupcakes, sprinkles and topping for “Cupcake Creation Area” <br /> where partygoers create their own cupcakes! <br />• Extra: If desired, theme invitation and grab-bags can be added! <br />Cost for this fun time is only $85! </pre><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3n23oe3lfZZZZZZZZZ95jf7dce5a98f2111.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />If your Mom did this it would be more or less okay, but past that, the shoddiness of the work is going to be apparent. And, for eighty-five bucks?!? What the hell is this lady thinking? It's almost bad enough for <a href="http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/">Cake Wrecks</a>.<br /><br />If that wasn't enough disappointment for one party, you can buy $3 worth of dollar-store decorations and gently used paper plates for <a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/bab/1181686202.html">$25</a>.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3na3of3l8ZZZZZZZZZ95l55bddc46da8117.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />What's behind these prices? Gambling debt? <br /><br />I could not resist clicking on <a href="http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/bab/1186342363.html">Is your child attending a birthday party in June? - $10</a>, which turned out to be <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/3k63m23lcZZZZZZZZZ95obfc014df03e116.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />with even more sales patter:<br /><pre><br />Don't be caught shopping at the last minute. <br />Ceramic Pet Dish Kit <br />Paint a sturdy ceramic pet dish in any style for your favourite four-legged friend. Ages 7 and up. <br /><br />Never opened. Includes dish, paint and brush. <br /><br />Originally $16.99+taxes. <br /></pre><br />I like the enthusiasm with the naked greed. This sort of tat goes on sale all the time, $3.99 at Winners, but: <i>Don't be caught shopping at the last minute.</i> Drive cross-town to give this yutz $10!<br /><br />"Mom, you spent all the money on cupcakes that look like they fell on the floor, my BFF gave me a pet bowl and I don't even have a pet, and there are stains on the fire truck napkins. How can you make my party any worse?" <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW82327491.jpg" img align="center"><br /><pre><br />Having a childs birthday party? As seen in the pic I have<br />several items used to make up loot bags for children 3-13! <br />All items are brand new. everything from giant pencils to <br />light up pens to sticky hands to frisbees! and much more. <br />I have a few hundred available. I will supply 6 items per <br />loot bag. Each loot bag sells for $4. (items are worth .75 to 3.$) <br />Let me know how many loot bags you'll need :) <br /></pre><br />Nothing in the picture is "worth" even 75c, but I like the optimistic ":)."KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-87658781272035671412009-05-29T10:52:00.001-07:002009-05-29T11:51:24.571-07:00And one in the stinkI -- not a prude by any stretch of the imagination -- was shocked to see <a href="http://www2.victoriassecret.com/commerce/onlineProductDisplay.vs?namespace=productDisplay&origin=onlineProductDisplay.jsp&event=display&prnbr=CP-231112&cgname=OSKEYPTYZZZ&rfnbr=8669">these</a> in a Victoria's Secret catalogue that arrived yesterday:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/V285352_CROP1.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />4 SRS? I mean, I thought of them as a sort of mainstream underwear retailer, not a hardcore sex shop.<br /><br />They seem so outright <i>dirty</i> that I assume the male equivalent must be <a href="http://www.nowashunderwear.com/">these</a>:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/frontlabelonline.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/backlabelonline-1.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />...which we can be grateful are not combined with <a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=25506380">this</a>:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_fullxfull72270232.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Can you imagine how revolting if there was a penis emblazoned on the brown and yellow shreddies? Okay. So probably neither idea was a good one, then.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-5463663363982923482009-05-27T04:18:00.000-07:002009-05-27T06:36:59.141-07:00Guest snark -- M. PiperRisible 'fashion' courtesy Etsy; comments courtesy Mark Piper.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24920872">Reversible Two Sided Collar</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN70298288.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"On my planet, we wear these to store the health-giving Nerdoid radiation which protects us from ever having to make conversation..."<br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=21024570">WildFlower Medallion Obi Belt</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN57918759.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"I am strong in The Force - but I'm also fabulous."<br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23693605">Ripstop Nylon Party Dress in Wine</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN66183355.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"Oooh, Jennifer, mom is going to be so pissed at the hole you cut in the pool cover."<br /><br /><br /><small><i>ed. note: What a surprise to find all three of these items are currently on sale! Don't delay, etc.</i></small>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-35661175953165931312009-05-25T08:14:00.001-07:002009-05-25T08:14:22.134-07:00Steamed double penisI am a great fan of <a href="http://allrecipes.com/">allrecipes.com</a> not because I want a new way to use up the leftover Velveeta, but because I like sniggering at the white trashiness of the content. The site has an entire section given over to <a href="http://allrecipes.com/Recipes/Everyday-Cooking/Convenience-Cooking/Canned-Food-Recipes/Canned-Soup-and-Stock/Canned-Cream-of-Mushroom-Soup/Main.aspx">recipes involving canned cream of mushroom soup</a>. The latter includes an appalling recipe for <a href="http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Rice-Puree/Detail.aspx">baby food made with canned soup</a> ("Sodium: 587mg").<br /><br />Naturally, people enjoy posting pictures.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/220130.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />...supposedly <a href="http://allrecipes.com/Cook/Photo.aspx?photoID=220130">chicken salad</a>. "Those are the leftovers from lunch." Great, pal. Pitch it or cover it and put it in the fridge -- don't goddam take a picture of it.<br /><br />Here is <i>steamed double penis after a big sneeze</i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/67303.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Actually <a href="http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Hot-Dog-a-la-Potato/Detail.aspx">Hot Dog a la Potato</a>. You know without clicking through that the cheese specified is "American." I don't wish to snark on people eating comfort-food crap with cheese nuked on, which can be enjoyable, but...posting "recipes" for it? With a photograph? Tragically, they've made even mac and cheese look inedible:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/180140.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Rather inexplicably the site includes "recipes" for exotic creations such as <a href="http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Sweetened-Whipped-Cream/Detail.aspx"><i>Sweetened</i> Whipped Cream</a>, the addition of sugar having heretofore been a trade secret. Much like epicurious.com's <a href="http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Salted-Water-for-Boiling-105591">Salted Water for Boiling</a> "recipe." The rub lies in the reviews; epicurious.com got nothing but snark for its boiled water, but allrecipes.com has tapped an audience of people for whom whipping cream was a genuine novelty. <i>This recipe works like a charm! So quick and simple, no need to buy the stuff in the can!</i>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-1467731071440744002009-05-24T08:38:00.000-07:002009-05-24T08:44:27.170-07:00FS: unreliable birth controlThe real problem with this shit is that it is contagious. Somebody will see this, and think "Gosh, I didn't know you could sell that sort of thing on-line. I still have most of that box of tampons from Costco that I never finished because they were so leaky. It was $20, too, so maybe I can get something for them," and a photograph of a dented box of tampons will go up...<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW89750941.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.UsedOttawa.com/classified-ad/8975094">prophylactic and test paper for pregnancy</a><br /><br /><i>$10 prophylactic <br />$3 test paper for pregnancy </i><br /><p><br /><p><br /><small>("Alesse" is a brand of birth control pills.)</small>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-28640147254175787042009-05-24T04:05:00.000-07:002009-05-24T06:45:30.029-07:00The shape of LOLZ<a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/">theshapeofamother.com</a> is a great, if unintentional, source of teh LOLZ. It is seemingly nothing but girls who had a baby and who now look fine posting pictures of themselves <a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/blog/2-months-pp-body-samantha/">thin</a> saying "See how hideous I am" in order to get a pile-up of people posting "You look awesome and I wish I could be you!" or, girls who had a baby and who are now <a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/blog/uncomfortable-in-my-own-skin-becky/">fat</a>, posting pictures of themselves in order to hear a lot of "Me too."<br /><br />Many are teen-agers. Here's <a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/blog/1-month-after-delivering-a-baby-brittney/">Britney</a>, who says "I hate being body continuous[sic]. I’ve never been like this before!"<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/050609-brittney-4.jpg" img align="centre"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/050609-brittney-2.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Yeah, you can totally tell she was never "body continuous" before what with the heels and bikini snaps. Here's her "after" shot:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/050609-brittney-6.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Ha ha, u is tramp.<br /><br /><a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/blog/thankful-and-blessed-but-still-trying-to-accept-mummyoftwodarlings/">Mummy of two darlings</a> moans <i>when I look at my belly I feel so disappointed. I wouldn’t change having my children for any model’s body, and having to experience both my babies fight in hospital has made me so thankful for what I have. I am slowly learning to accept my new body and realise that the old one is gone for good. I am never going to look like my baby-less friends but I have something far more precious than their flab free, stretch mark free tummies!</i> Yeah, I'm not really buying the lack of envy for a "model's body."<br /><br />But how horrible is Two Darlings' "baby belly I am still trying to accept"? <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/051409-mummyoftwodarlings-4.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Eww, hideous!<br /><br />Is it wrong to LOLZ at this? I don't think so, especially not when they post <a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/blog/anonymous-36/">dross</a> like <i>There were stretch marks there, but they were as sand beneath my fingertips, gentle ripples to echo the motion of the tide against the shore; the swelling tide of pregnancy and the receding tide of birth...</i> And when they're not spouting nonsense, they're just plain <a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/blog/i-dont-feel-beautiful-anymore-anonymous/">shallow</a>. Few of these girls are realistic about anything, and the site's a clusterfuck of encouragement for their delusions.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-40087003847904937722009-05-16T08:54:00.000-07:002009-05-23T16:09:27.850-07:00The Bridesmaid's Dilemma.<img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW68811004.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Bridesmaid's dresses are not really 'dresses' per se. They're more like costumes. Badly sewn (see above) polyester costumes. So what to do with them after the wedding? Well, you could do what my aunt once did, viz: give it to your niece for her dress-up box. Man, I got a lot of mileage out of that bizarre gown...<br /><br />However, the used bridesmaid's dress in the closet + free classifieds is too much of a lure for the greedy, and thus there is a great deal of<br /><br /><i>Five Alfred Angelo Cinnamon dresses. Brand new, never worn. Paid $231.65 each (proof of purchase available). Would like to sell each one for $150 ... better deal if you buy all five. <br /><br />Sizes : 6 - 14 -16 - 18 - 22</i><br /><br />and<br /><br /><i>I paid $200 for it and letting it go at $125. A great deal!</i><br /><br />on Craigslist et al. As though it were really likely that somebody else happens to have a collection of five naked bridesmaids, one medium, two large, two XL. And this somebody else has no interest in being able to choose from a variety of dresses, and 35% off -- 35% off <i>clothing</i>, a commodity without a fixed price which goes on sale all the damn time -- would make these things with their funny smells in the armpit and sticky ? on the hem suddenly appealing.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW85188851.jpg" img align="centre"><br /><br />Oh, come now. Bring it to the Sally Ann or your niece...<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/481239239_6b061fe68a.jpg" img align="centre"><br /><br />...you knew it was bad when you cropped your head off.<br /><br />Bridesmaids' dresses, even new, invariably come with the same sort of built-in warning that Reitman's and other bad-idea cheap clothing ads do, viz: <br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/S0914179_NAN09_508_BKG216x270.jpg" img align="centre"><br /><br />if it does not look good on the model, it -- no question -- will not look good on you. It takes a lot of gall to charge big prices for these crappy frocks in the first place, but the retailers are also selling The [Wedding] Dream &c; trying to sell it a second time, when it simply looks lousy and advertises 'I was had,' is amoral.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-72233658263178644262009-05-16T08:46:00.000-07:002009-05-16T08:48:11.726-07:00Antler Chandelier<img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW84500022.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />"<a href="http://www.usedottawa.com/classified-ad/8450002">Buy mine for $600.00</a>..." Hurry, these are going fast.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-39373879592156164612009-05-10T10:12:00.000-07:002009-05-12T10:06:24.255-07:00Etsy modelling special.<a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23763985">"Dress"</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN66413542.jpg" align="center"><br /><br /><small><small>christ tattoos look stupid on 97% of tattooed folk</small></small><br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=16097846">"Sweater"</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN40884247.jpg" align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24644424">"Dress"</a> 2<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN69371181.jpg" align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=24572524">"Underpants on head man"</a><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN69130493.jpg" align="center">KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-42234077580422180662009-05-09T11:20:00.000-07:002009-05-09T11:27:17.503-07:00Dueling t-shirts<a href="http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5386684">T-shirts for children with messages that help promote positive attitudes and behaviors.</a><br /><br />Albeit with some conflicts.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN43502527.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN17878064.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />The thoroughly bizarre <a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=9052968">listing</a> for the latter advises, "Use a pedifile to remove dry skin on heals." Might be hard to talk him into it if you're wearing the first tee, though.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-77771099642933535062009-05-09T06:34:00.000-07:002009-05-09T06:56:31.495-07:003-in-1<i>When closed it acts as a fire place with mantel. There is a log that you plug in to look like an actual fire.</i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW89665131.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />But wait, there's more! <i>When opened you can display the record player and 8 track tape machine.</i><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW89665132.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br /><table><br /><tr><td>A steal at <a href="http://www.usedottawa.com/classified-ad/8966513">$50</a>. I like the shot glasses, knick-knackery, and tidy collection of phone books. All that's missing from is a set of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Reference_desk/Archives/Humanities/2008_January_9#Wally_dugs">wally dugs</a>; it's a strangely Scottish display. This is classic basement Canadiana at its finest and I bet the "wood" parts have at least two hundred layers of Lemon Pledge on them.<br /><td><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/02900012.jpg" img align="center"><br /></tr><br /></table><br /><br />From the same seller:<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW89665451.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />...unsurprisingly.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-22935273583735903292009-05-07T06:44:00.000-07:002009-05-07T06:48:30.540-07:00"Chair" and "table"<img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/YOW70886001.jpg" img align ="center"><br /><br />For ur house!<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/kids_drawing_yellow_rf_house.gif" img align="center"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.usedottawa.com/classified-ad/7088600">$60</a>.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-50378901025558143472009-05-07T06:00:00.000-07:002009-05-07T06:06:42.157-07:00LOLZ u make nice stuffAfter crapping on so many crafters I couldn't resist smiling about somebody doing a nice job. <a href="http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6920208">GrandmaLindasHouse</a> ("Proud member of Wild Wise Witty Grandmamas Team") makes stylish Barbie garments at exceptionally reasonable prices.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN60249290.jpg" align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN65092619.jpg" align="center"><br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/il_430xN68397136.jpg" align="center"><br /><br />Stylish coat with handknitted scarf, $8; retro tunic, $3, green paisley dress, $4. My daughter is not (yet?) a Barbie fan, but if she was I'd be shopping here. That she's taken the time to adorn the $4 dress with Barbie-scale buttons is amazing. Stylish stuff, and the reviews compliment the sewing. Nicely done, Grandma Linda.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-47058976816550141242009-05-05T10:19:00.000-07:002009-05-05T10:27:42.905-07:00Ew.In the used-furniture section of <a href="http://www.usedottawa.com/classified-ad/8931022">usedottawa.com</a>: "A bed women love."<br /><br />A "Black leathered frame, Queen size waterbed." In good shape; only a few notches.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-42731403707267004362009-05-04T09:19:00.000-07:002009-05-04T09:22:06.372-07:00Pipe cleaner heart ??? = PROFIT!!!There's a lot wrong with <a href="http://www.rubylane.com/shops/briarpatch3/item/3152">this</a> -- it's ugly, it's an absurd $425 ("During these hard times I would be willing to work out a time period to pay for this lovely one of a kind piece!"), but the real LOLZ come from the pipe cleaner heart.<br /><br /><img src="http://i623.photobucket.com/albums/tt319/listinglolz/31521L.jpg" img align="center"><br /><br />Like she had her six-year-old set it up. I'm surprised there's not a little pile of gold glitter beside it, too.KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5523122892809258874.post-66258572261236317012009-05-02T11:35:00.000-07:002009-05-02T11:38:18.454-07:00Shut up idiots!<i>If you idiots are wise enough to state that this product is fake then why the hell will you purchase a 24 pcs MAC brushes if you all knew so well that a single MAC brush will cost about $20 and up. Stop your non-sense already and get on with your life, Before you buy something make sure to read the reviews and check for more information about the products that you're trying to purchase, I hate stupid people who will buy something and then return it just because they are DUMB. Why are you guys even coming here to amazon if you all have money to buy like what other people is saying,To get a cheap deal? But why still come here if you can afford to buy the original one, Why don't you just wait for the season sale and help yourself with all the authentic stuffs that you would like to purchase and or Why don't you just drag yourself to the mall and save yourself time and give us other buyers a break. Now a days more people are being wise on how to use their money and I'm not saying I'm siding to those people who produce fake products but So what if it's fake, I'm not saying its not usable.If it can save me money in all cost then why not, Quality is good is you have a lot of money in your pocket but if you don't then its quantity over quality. Stop with this harsh reviews already. If you suspect that there is something wrong with the price and the product then don't purchase it. It's as simple as that.</i><br /><br />From a retailer of fake M.A.C. brushes on <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/cdp/member-reviews/A3KL7NZ2LZPN0/ref=cm_cr_dp_auth_rev?ie=UTF8&sort%5Fby=MostRecentReview">amazon.com</a>KMMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14673222633325891745noreply@blogger.com0